So it’s tax time again. Many people get very frustrated, scared, confused and angry when doing their taxes. As with the Olympic successes and disappointments, I’ll ask if you can do your taxes and just notice those experiences that don’t feel so good, and use them as indicators, like a low fuel light in your car, to fill your emotional tank. You see, it’s when we got low on the mindfulness fuel that our pain body, fear body, ego, whatever you want to call it, kicks in. REMEMBER—the kicking in itself is just an indicator light—nothing to fear or judge, it’s just there to be seen and tended to with kindness.

How? Good question. I ALWAYS encourage people to start with anchoring their breath; it’s portable, you have voluntary control over how you are breathing, and it doesn’t take too long for the benefits to kick in, even if subtle in the beginning. So, breathe like you’re sleeping: that is, letting your tummy fall out as you inhale with a long and smooth breath through the nose, then pull the tummy back in as you exhale in a smooth long breath out of your mouth (slightly pressed lips will help to regulate the speed of your exhale). Your tummy should be moving in and out, not your chest (though some chest movement is fine, over time, it will be minimal). Of course, have healthy posture whether sitting or lying down.

Great, now you’re breathing more correctly. You can stop here and do great, but some folks find it helpful to add a few simple things. While you take a 5 min break from taxes to breathe like you’re sleeping, you can say certain things to yourself as you inhale (like “I am breathing in (calmness, light, love, sanity)” and “I am breathing out (stress, fear, etc OR love, kindness etc”—some folks like to feel like they are giving something good back out to the universe, so they enjoy breathing in good stuff, and sending it back out . . . either way is wonderful). You can add visuals if you like, but remember, meditation does NOT need to be complicated—Buddha used a single pointed meditation when he was enlightened—you guessed it—his single focus he returned to was his breath.

Now you’ve got a nice smooth rhythm going with your breath, maybe some words or images coming in and out with it . . . what about when distracting thoughts come in (like, “I’m bored, I’m anxious, I’ve got ants in my pants, Did I leave the stove on? Where are my keys, What am I going to do about my taxes? I’m pissed at my family member, friend, etc.). FIRST~~DON’T TRY TO CHASE THE THOUGHT AWAY!! Just see it for what it is. A wonderful monk, Thich Nhat Hanh has some great phrases you can use to become more OK with feelings as they arise: “Breathing in, I notice that I am angry,” “Breathing out, I accept my anger and return to my breath.” There are many variations of this, but you get the idea—keep with your breath WHILE you feel the emotion; if you enter into judging the emotion, or trying to chase it away, simply return to the breath and a statement like the one above.

With daily practice, your brain actually rewires itself and comes to ‘expect’ that you will use your breath to restore balance while experiencing a ‘negative’ emotion. This doesn’t mean that the feeling goes away, but it does help to resolve the unnecessary energy expended on judging and/or feeling stuck/screwed. What part of the brain rewires? The left medial prefrontal cortex. Yup, this is real neurobiology folks, not just a bunch of psychobabble, new agey gobbledy-gook. Look it up for yourself in any trusted medical journal. WebMd.com is a great place to look. But feel free to try the Journal of American Medicine, or any other publication you trust.

This has turned into a long post. . .I’ll write another on some other ways to relate to your breath. In the meantime, look around the blog. I’ve written several posts on this kind of thing, and will often repeat things I’ve put on here before. . . which, of course, is just a repeat of things people have been saying for thousands of years.